Dhish.. Dhush.. Bhiskyaw..
Don’t run away. I have not gone mad. These are the sounds of the firecrackers telling the whole world that I am back with a bang. It’s been almost a month since my last post. Reasons are obvious and these hurdles in blogging seem to be perpetual. You can go through my archives to find the probable reasons if you are still interested.
As for the the post title, I am going to tell you some secrets of writing. These secrets were discovered by me in the last whole month with some extensive re-search(Notice and read the hyphen). This will change the whole blogging world and anyone who reads further will take a big step towards writing. I suggest to stumble, digg or bookmark this post as soon as you finish.
Here are the five secrets of writing.
- Read books by controversial authors. Learn from them how to create a controversy. Implement it in your writing and find yourself everywhere. You’ll find yourself on YouTube videos featuring peoples using your poster as toilet paper. This will increase your popularity exponentially as YouTube is very popular.
- Create characters which will indulge in romance. Doesn’t matter if it’s straight or the opposite of straight. What’s important is the romantic, erotic description of them making love.
- Use abusive and vulgar language. That’s a “must” rule in modern writing. If you don’t know to write using vulgar words, Go fuck yourself. (This is just example. Not meant to you)
- Hire a ghost writer. He will write for you and you’ll get paid x number of times more than him. Do not use this trick if you are afraid of ghosts.
- Learn foreign languages like Chinese, Japanese, Korean and translate their literature in English. They hardly read English literature and very few English literates read their literature. Don’t think it’s plagiarism. You are doing a work of honor by spreading the knowledge around the world rather than restricting to a certain region.
Follow these rules and you are on the right path of success(I wonder if there is any wrong path of success). Please give credit to me or this post at least for your success.
Keep Blogging and Keep Writing…
P.S. : The sound of firecrackers at the start of this post turned out to be those used in Diwali celebrations. I thought…
It’s been days since I am thinking of posting about music. Today I got right time when one of my favorite movie score won Oscars. Yup, The Slumdog Millionaire. The passion for music made me write this post. My collection of music is growing and growing and growing. There is no restriction of language when it comes to music. I listen to music in many languages and it is a global language. Language is not a barrier for a music buff. Though Hindi, Marathi and English makes most of my music, I do listen to Tamil, Telugu, Kannada and Konkani music. Not all of it I understand but still it leaves effect on me. If the song is sad song without knowing the meaning of a single word the feeling comes to me. If the song is romantic then it leaves that effect.This is the beauty of music. It is not just me, ask any true music lover. You’ll get a similar reply.
For the past few month I’ve lost my interest in music. The reason is the quality of music. Now a days it is very difficult to find a good combination of lyrics and music which together forms music. And if at all a song has good music it fails on lyrics side. It hurts when you find lyrics killing a song. I don’t want to give examples here. The current hot genre is the Rap music. It sounds good in some tracks but otherwise it is not at all good on ears. This is my opinion. You may be one of the greatest rap follower or rap fan. But not me. A good lyrics also helps a song to get popular.
My passion for music started when I entered the college. Within a year I became an avid Rock fan. I used to listen to a lot of variety from Linkin Park, Limp Bizkit, Metallica, Nirvana, Sepulatara, and some other selected tracks from various composers. It all started with “Wherever I may roam” by Metallica. “In the end” remains my favorite rock track. The lines “I tried so hard and got so far, In the end it doesn’t even matter” pictured my life at that stage. (Yeah you guessed it right. The Back papers..:P).During that stage I got my favorite track “Stuck in a moment” by U2 and another one “Walking Away” by Craig David. I get goosebumps when I recall those moments and but feel proud I got out of those successfully. Music played a big role in that. Music has the soothing effect which can heal many wounds not cured by any medicine.
To make this post the longest post so far in my blog, I am adding a list of my favorites track.
1) Zindagi Ke Safar Mein – Kishore Kumar
2) Aanewala Pal – Kishore Kumar
3) Main Zindagi Ka Sath – Mohd. rafi
4) Chukar Mere Man Ko – Kishore Kumar
5) Tere Bin Jeena Nahi – Bali Brahmabhatt
1) Stuck In A Moment – U2
2) In The End – Linkin Park
3) Walking Away – Craig david
4) Nothing’s Gonna Change My Love – George Benson
5) Be With you – Enrique Iglesias
It’s difficult to control that list and I somehow did that. Yeah I am great. It is indeed difficult to choose when you have zillions of songs. There are many more which I love to listen. I cannot list all of them here. Keep listening to music. I hope you were doing the same while reading this…
When you are learning language, pay attention to grammar. Those were the words of my English teacher. No guesses for what I did. I ignored and here I stand before you with my poor grammar skills. I knew this when I started this blog and I thought I’ll improve. I have improved to some extent. That’s enough. Now about the “And”. Sorry for ruining the lyrics of that rocking track by Linkin Park. That tops my favorites list.
What to do? I couldn’t think of any better title. This “And” became my topic when I was having conversation on twitter. One tweet appeared on my twitter homepage.
“If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you need to count to find the first letter A?”
I knew the answer and I replied “thousand”. And one twitter replied with “one hundred and one”. Now comes the confusion. Which one is correct? I knew it was “thousand” but the one who asked the question got confused. Moral is “Having bad grammar helps you to stay away from confusion”.
Improper grammar leads to funny incidents also. It can be embarrassing if you don’t take things lightly. (I am very serious kind of person. Don’t make fun of me.) Take this candidate’s application :
“This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ‘typist and an accountant – Male or Female’. As I am both for the past several years and I can handle both, I am applying for the post.”
When I was in college, there was a legendary workshop supervisor. His English was very bad. In the first workshop class he said “Machine the on”. It took all the courage and effort in the world to stop myself from laughing. I’ll never forget this incidence.
This post is just for fun and not at all to show my hate or love towards English. It will be always the language which is my mother tongue. I just took this as a challenge to write a post from a simple ignorable tweet. Oh!! And to clarify all the doubts about the riddle. In the end the “And” doesn’t matter.
I cannot say “Till my next grammatical mistake”. It will be in the next post itself. So I’ll say,
Till English is a funny language…
I have already written some posts regarding language. But this is a vast subject which is sufficient to give you topic everyday. If you know more than one language, which most of you do, then you have a potential to write about language. I am good at four languages and about five of them i am in learning stages. So I have good material to write about though I choose not to write often. That would convert this blog into “The Language Blog”. After some days I’ll get some eggs and tomatoes at me.
This incidence happened yesterday while I was talking to my friend. Yeah the same friend who own a pharmacy. I talked to him after so many days due to my busy schedule. (I hate to use this “busy” word.) I was standing there and doing the thing I liked the most. Observing peoples. I do it unconsciously now as it has turned out to be my habit. After a few minutes an old woman entered the pharmacy. This is the woman whom I helped to get to the clinic. (Are you listening Santa?? I deserve a gift here.)
She gave her prescription and started talking. A bit surprised, she couldn’t talk properly. The last time I met her she was talking good. This time she wasn’t able to pronounce properly. Every word she uttered was incomplete and used to end abruptly. Try to speak without using your tongue. Something similar happened. What amused me that we were still able to get what she wanted to say.
This mystery will stay with me for long. How can we just interpret when we are unable to get the whole word? Of course it was not 100% correct interpretation but close to that. Its the beauty of a small part inside our head, that we call brain. A while back I read an e-mail where the words had the first and last letter in correct position and rest all altered. I was still able to read the paragraph without any mistake or without much effort. I hope to solve this mystery in this lifetime.
Request to all search engines: Don’t mark this post as spam due to the use of the word pharmacy. There are pharmacies which exists offline.
Till I solve the mystery…
Question: Which is the most used language in this world?
Answer: Chinese. No English. No Hindi…
The fight goes on. Question remains unanswered. Most used language changes according to time. So what is the correct answer of this question? Personally I feel it is Binary language. Don’t laugh.( Actually you should 😀 ) It is the truth. I cannot prove it statistically and I am not writing this to prove this also.
Just to convince you a little bit. What is the language of computer? It is not the one you are writing or your operating system is running. It is Binary language. Just ones and zeros that add, subtract, divide, multiply and give you the results. There may be thousands of languages around the world. People speak different languages but computer speaks only one languages. I don’t have to further tell you how much computers are used in today’s word. Do I?
Decades ago, There was nothing digital. Everything analog which creates noise and need more maintenance. This mostly applies to communication field but not limited to. After the discovery of diodes and triodes, the world started moving towards a digital age. All analog things started to be replaced by digital ones. Much of them proved to be more efficient. Now many of us hate analog things. Just as an example.. Do you prefer digital camera or analog? Bike with digital odometer or analog?
We are moving towards a digital globe. Soon everything you think will turn to digital. Not everything actually. But most of the things. It has already started. It may seem that we are making progress by going digital, it may not be true. Analog has an edge that it can be controlled by the one who drives it. When it’s digital you can’t say. You may not have control over that. I like some things digital and it includes my watch also. But the classy analog watch is still the best.
I am not at all trying to make you stop from buying anything digital. Just remember, tomorrow the robot washing your clothes may wash them with you inside the cloth.