The Art Of Writing

Boom..
Dhooom…
Splash…
Dhish.. Dhush.. Bhiskyaw..

Don’t run away. I have not gone mad. These are the sounds of the firecrackers telling the whole world that I am back with a bang. It’s been almost a month since my last post. Reasons are obvious and these hurdles in blogging seem to be perpetual. You can go through my archives to find the probable reasons if you are still interested.

As for the the post title, I am going to tell you some secrets of writing. These secrets were discovered by me in the last whole month with some extensive re-search(Notice and read the hyphen). This will change the whole blogging world and anyone who reads further will take a big step towards writing. I suggest to stumble, digg or bookmark this post as soon as you finish.

Here are the five secrets of writing.

  • Read books by controversial authors. Learn from them how to create a controversy. Implement it in your writing and find yourself everywhere. You’ll find yourself on YouTube videos featuring peoples using your poster as toilet paper. This will increase your popularity exponentially as YouTube is very popular.
  • Create characters which will indulge in romance. Doesn’t matter if it’s straight or the opposite of straight. What’s important is the romantic, erotic description of them making love.
  • Use abusive and vulgar language. That’s a “must” rule in modern writing. If you don’t know to write using vulgar words, Go fuck yourself. (This is just example. Not meant to you)
  • Hire a ghost writer. He will write for you and you’ll get paid x number of times more than him. Do not use this trick if you are afraid of ghosts.
  • Learn foreign languages like Chinese, Japanese, Korean and translate their literature in English. They hardly read English literature and very few English literates read their literature.  Don’t think it’s plagiarism. You are doing a work of honor by spreading the knowledge around the world rather than restricting to a certain region.

Follow these rules and you are on the right path of success(I wonder if there is any wrong path of success). Please give credit to me or this post at least for your success.

Keep Blogging and Keep Writing…
Think Nonsense…

P.S. : The sound of firecrackers at the start of this post turned out to be those used in Diwali celebrations. I thought…

Best of Top ten lists

As the year end comes these top ten lists start coming from nowhere. There are lots and lots of these starting from the first week of December. By now, you may have read many of such lists. So here is another. The difference is, this is the list of ten best top ten lists of the year. After searching for two days and reading and removing all those junk lists, I compiled the best(the best I thought).

1) Top Ten Green Architecture Projects of 2008: I am inclined towards nature. Hence I like anything which helps for rehabilitation of nature or eco-friendly projects. That is why this list tops my list. The projects mentioned here are awesome and eye-candy. It is good to see construction going eco-friendly.

2) Top Ten Most viewed photo galleries on National Geographic: Nat-Geo website has been always a mine of good photos. It keeps producing some jewels every year. Here is the list of most viewed galleries on Nat-Geo. Every gallery is filled with stunning pictures.

3) The Ten Best New Gadgets 2008: Technology always improves in an exponential way. That curve never gets a fall and new and improved gadgets come every year. This is the list of Ten best new gadgets that arrived in the market this year. You’ll definitely wish to own at least one of them.

4) The Top 10 Everything of 2008: While writing this post I found that there are already some lists which are lists of top ten list. That made things a bit easy for me. This is the times list of almost everything in top ten for 2008. They say it everything but I still have nine other list not mentioned in that list. ^_^

5) Top Ten list by Computerworld: This is the second top ten list I found worth mentioning. It mostly consist of tech related list but also includes list which are not related to technology. How about Top Ten worst employees of 2008?

6) Top Ten movies of 2008: This not just simple list of Top Ten movies. It lists Top Ten movies of 2008 from the movies ratings sites like Metacritic. I found this list as the best in all the Top Ten movies lists. I was more happy to see that I watched almost all the movies in those lists.

7) Top ten sports moments: How can I miss the sports? I love to watch sport and play some. It just brings out the wild side of me. Here are the Top Ten moments from the sports world for the year 2008.

8) YouTube’s Best Of 2008: What Nat-Geo is for Pictures, YouTube is for videos. From the millions of videos uploaded to this site here are the Top Ten videos of the year 2008. If you had a bad year 2008 and no time for laughs, this list will try to make up for that loss.

9) Top 10 New Organisms of 2008: We have not yet discovered the whole world. There are some places which are just on the maps and never been explored. Such places always result in new organisms. This list gives the best finds or organisms in this year. It’s not a fairytale.

10) Top Ten Top Ten Top Tens! of 2008: This is not actually top ten of 2008. This is a list of top ten posts posted on that blog. So it’s kind of personal. But I gave it a mention because every post made me burst out in laughter. That is why it gets this place and this list deserves it.

So that’s all for my two days of searching all over the internet for the best lists. You may think that some lists don’t deserve this place but I do. I tried to be honest and find the best. Cheers to the year 2008 for all the good things it gave and to the lessons we learned from the bad things.

Bye Bye 2008 and Welcome 2009…

Till the next Top ten list…

Think Nonsense…